Especially Elegant Elevator Etiquette

Compared to the vast majority of the other people who work in my office’s building, I am small potatoes. I don’t get to do the things they get to do, such as expense account swanky lunches, take car services everywhere, or get paid properly. However, there is one situation where I am a member of the privileged class: the elevator. If I’m at the back of a crowded downward-bound elevator full of male bigwigs, when we reach the bottom, NO ONE will get out before me. Why? Because I am a lady.

We all have to shuffle about awkwardly so that I can squeeze out. Sometimes I’m wearing my adidas sandals, carrying my gym bag or general looking scruffy, which makes it particularly embarrassing.

I have to say though, I do enjoy this ritual. Why? (Sarah C., take that appalled expression off your face!) Because it is just that: a ritual. It’s like saying bless you: kind of annoying and unnecessary, but somehow cute. AND it makes me feel special, even if it’s just because I happen to have 2 X chromosomes. Or wait… because I have a Y chromosome? No, no, women have 2 X’s. Right? Right.

Lucky I wasn’t a geneticist, as I contemplated very briefly while in high school! AP Bio stifled that desire!